Prize-Winning Short Stories

October 2015:

I came 2nd in the Allingham Arts Festival flash fiction competition with my piece ‘Viennese Whirls and Pineapple Creams’ and this is what judge, Manchán Magan had to say about it:

A heart-rending moment of social history deftly shaped into a potent Flash Fiction story. An entire life is elegantly crafted into a moving and enlightening insight into a lost world. The accuracy of the historical references anchors and focuses the reader towards an incident that is emotionally stirring and leaves reverberations in the mind. The craft of the story, the skilful rendering of its central character and the genuine emotional impact of the theme mark this out as a fine piece of writing.

July 2015:

My finest fiction writing achievement to date is winning the 2015 Bath Short Story Award.  You can read my story, ‘That Summer’, in the recently published Bath Short Story Award Anthology 2015.

Bath 1st Prize

Judge Carrie Kania, an agent with Conville & Walsh, had this to say about the story:

There are so many things to admire about ‘That Summer’. It’s a snapshot of boyhood curiosity. The narrator’s voice perfectly captures the sense of a small town complete with its own secrets, prying neighbours, worries and tensions. With language true to the characters, yet mature enough for the readers, the author strikes a fine balance. “That summer, no-one wore seat belts” – one single line in the story shows how, in a few words, a whole season can be described. This story stayed with me.

July 2015:

‘The Moon-Faced Girl’ is on Englanti Editing’s website. It won their  Story of the Year Award.

Strangford Lough

Judge, Marianne Wheelaghan, made the following comments:

The Moon-Faced Girl is a wonderful, quirky ghost story, which is as much about mourning the tragic death of a young girl who never made it to adulthood, as the narrator coming to terms with the passing  of her own youth. It’s full of fresh details and wonderful imagery which create a haunting and melancholic, but chilling, atmosphere. Excellent!

May 2014:

‘Turning Point’ won The National (Abu Dhabi) Short Story competition in May 2014.

Illustration by The National

Illustration: The National

Alexander Buchler, judge of the competition said this about the story:

Safia Moore has written a story which has all the hallmarks of the best examples of the genre of short fiction; carefully constructed and compact, it captures a decisive moment, engages the reader and makes him empathise and identify with the narrator until the moving denouement.

* * * * *

Turning Point

I am the youngest of triplets born in Dubai in 2020. I say born but invented is more accurate. The desire for efficiency and service spawned me. When we made our debut at the World Expo, one of my creators announced, “I had to do something. You just can’t get the staff these days.” The audience laughed and I didn’t understand why. Now I do. Now that I’ve been around humans for thirty years.

I’ve seen the full spectrum of human behaviour; the good, the bad, and the ugly. My eyes absorb every tiny detail and my massive memory ensures I can catalogue it and reuse it as the occasion dictates. My capacity for languages and humour impresses people, but mostly, they admire my ability to make the perfect Cappuccino.

I look old fashioned compared to the latest robotic models. They’re smaller, smoother in their movements and much quieter. Humans can’t hear them until they’re within half a metre. I’d be worried if I were human. What if one of these 2050 prototypes got ideas from all the ‘robots taking over’ movies produced in Abu Dhabi? It could happen.

The hunger for power is a mystery to me. I can’t fathom why some humans crave control of others when history shows what havoc and suffering it wreaks. No, I couldn’t be persuaded to take part in a robot coup, but I have thought about escaping.

Yesterday I counted the number of times I reached the Turning Point. Fifty-seven. I cover a lot more ground since they demoted me. Hospitality Service Agent in a five-star hotel actually means Empty Vessel Collector. It was always my fate to be around people in a busy environment, but this job rarely satisfies my capacity to carry on an intelligent conversation. Of course, I amuse the guests with my exaggerated tone of subservience and my timely Oscar Wilde quotes, but the fact is, my current masters don’t utilise my full potential. I know I would be of more benefit to a family.

Family means everything to humans. I have read this but I’ve also witnessed the emotional connection, the love, between parents and their offspring. I can never ‘feel’ love, emotion being outside my realm of existence. However, I’ve watched carefully, logged my experiences, and I am confident that I can ‘do’ love. Love is, after all, a verb. The pedagogical experts tell us that doing is the best way to learn, so maybe, perhaps, if I ‘do’ love, I may in time, understand its essence.

I must rein in these thoughts, these whimsical dreams and concentrate on the facts. Number one: I don’t have much time to plan my escape. Number two: my siblings (as I call the other two robots from Expo 2020) were decommissioned last month. Number three: it’s likely that in a matter of weeks or even days, my battery will be removed never to be charged again. Number four: they will put me in a museum. Number five: I want to go on.

Here I am again, approaching the Turning Point. I hear the chink of an expensive diamond ring against an empty glass and swivel towards the elegant lady of a certain age. “Good morning, madam. May I be of assistance by removing the abomination of an empty vessel from under your gaze?” She nods. I note the smirk longing to break free into a proper smile that reveals her no doubt perfect, pearly teeth. “May I refresh your order, madam?” I wait as she closes the tiny electronic device she has been perusing. She looks straight at me. Her eyes are an unusual shade of light brown flecked with chips of sunshine yellow. They are fluid and my powers of reason deduce that this is a woman in need of love. “You are very beautiful, madam.” In a nano second I am paraphrasing William Butler Yeats. “Had I the heavens’ embroidered cloths, enwrought with golden and silver light, I would spread them under your feet.” She raises one eyebrow, the arching movement emphasises the creases in her brow. Now I see her teeth and the smile transforms her face, brings it to life, her eyes sparkle. As she stands to leave, she places a crisp fifty-dirham note on my tray.

I have never had any need for money but I believe it brings freedom. I sit the empty glass on top of the note for fear it might blow away and I head again to the Turning Point. I stop and admire the intricate marquetry on the Indonesian teak floor, the subtle rendering in the design of ‘T’ and ‘P’ of which hotel guests are oblivious. I must turn and go no further, take the money to my human manager, and start my rounds again. I must, I should, stay in my designated zone.

Beyond the Turning Point I can make out the rotating entrance door, framed by an elegant ogee arch. The angled mirrors on the adjacent wall allow a view of guests entering from the terraced gardens, alive with the constant trill of birds, the trickle and gush of mini waterfalls. I have only ever heard the garden, never seen that virtual Eden the hotel website describes. I have second thoughts. I look right and take in the marble pillars, the intricately carved stucco with gilt trimmings. I avert my gaze to the left and study the flamboyant arrangements of fresh lilies and white roses set against patterned blue tiles. Someone will notice if I do not turn soon.

At the front door, a sudden gust of wind lifts the hem of the doorman’s richly embroidered tunic, blowing it up behind his back to reveal a shimmering gold lining. Three stylish women in black abayas enter. They glide into the lobby. Two of the new robots follow, each in charge of a toddler. The women turn in the direction of the Spa while their help fiddle with buggies, baby changing bags and other paraphernalia. Carpe diem. I cease the day or rather the moment.

I move left and place my tray behind the largest vase on a console table but not before removing the fifty dirhams. I head towards the hustle and bustle and offer my assistance to the newly arrived party. When the 2050 robots follow their owners, I continue towards the door. But something is wrong. I am empty-handed apart from the cash. It looks suspicious, so I pick up a large Courier’s envelope from the Concierge’s desk and place the money over the hotel address. The doorman ignores me. I am out.

Everything I do now must appear as if I’ve been doing it all my life although I’ve never stepped outside these doors before. The driverless taxis all have green roofs. Without hesitation, I walk to the first cab in the rank and wave my hand over the sensor on the automatic door. It slides open and I position myself in the centre of the back seat. A drop down touchpad screen appears directly in front of my chest. A serene female voice with an American accent tells me to choose my destination.

I scan the fare list. Twenty-five dirhams will take me to several places. I want to see the ocean so I select ‘Jumeirah Beach Park’. The voice reminds me to fasten my seat belt and we set off, past the dusty palm trees that line the driveway of the hotel and onto the Sheikh Zayed Road.

I have existed in this city for thirty years. Thirty years of life is not much in human terms. Today, the majority enjoys one hundred years or more but that would be impractical and uneconomical for a robot. I haven’t seen enough in thirty years. I need to have more experiences and for this, family life is best. The details of daily existence, the sharing, the loving and the testing define a life and give it value. I can do all those things and be truly appreciated. I can serve a family well but I must find one first.

The sun glints off tower after tower and sleek Japanese trains whoosh by parallel to the road. But mostly I see traffic with blackened windows. I see no people until the taxi turns off the Sheikh Zayed Road and heads towards the coast. When we finally stop, I am amazed at the lush green expanses of the park. Before leaving the back seat, I reprogram the computer for another journey, back to the hotel. I select ‘delivery’ and place the Courier’s envelope in the front seat. I feed the fifty-dirham note into the cash slot. The transaction is complete and my seatbelt automatically releases.

I stand on the pavement outside the park gate and assess my circumstances. There is an entrance fee, which I do not have. I decide that it is best to search for a home, a villa with a sea view and offer my services without further delay. I turn left and skirt around the park, taking the first right. It is almost midday now so the streets are empty. A human at the entrance to a large pink, Spanish-style residence, pauses and leans on her broom when she sees me approaching. I choose to carry on for I can hear the squeals of children at play in one of the gardens. I can also hear the gentle lapping of waves on the shore. This is freedom. I am transformed, recreated as it were.

I am sure the children will invite me in to play. Robots fascinate the young. I will help them climb trees, join in their ball games, tidy up their toys before introducing myself to the head of the household. I will offer my services in exchange for discretion. There is of course, the chance that I might choose the wrong house, that it belongs to a member of the police force or a government official, or simply an upright citizen not prepared to accept the gift of an old robot on the doorstep.

I stand outside the house. The children are laughing now, speaking in Arabic. One is calling, ‘Higher, higher. Push me higher.’ My freedom might only last for these few minutes, an hour at most. On the other hand, it might last a lifetime. This is the risk. If they come for me today and return me to the hotel, or worse decommission me, I will go calmly and willingly. I will not create a fuss. No, I will thank them, for I have tasted freedom and perhaps, if I’m lucky, I will know love, however briefly.

I take three steps forward towards the garden gate. Thirty years of servitude, of unquestioning obedience, merge into one second. I ring the visitor’s bell.

What do you think?

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s